Chunky couldn’t shake his growing nausea. Unky, his best and closest friend, had left him at the dumpster for that Gurdie May Wastebinder. It was just so wrong.
A Scheming Raccoon
Chunky was in no way happy about losing his friend to the flap-hatted dumpster gal, even if she was from Doofus County and heiress to the Wastebinder Happy Worm Farm fortune.
So he started scheming. He needed a plan, or something better. He thought, “What would make that sappy eyed Unky sit up and take notice?” Some the schemes included:
- Setting fire to the dumpster
- Leaping table to table in the Moo Cow Drive In
- Holding a Main Street rally with local raccoons
But none of those seemed right.
And Then It Happened
While Chunky was scheming, he noticed a big tent at the end of town. It was one of those traveling carnivals. Being naturally nosey, he waddled over and started sniffing around. All of sudden a woman was yelling, “What are you doing here you hairy little varmint?”
She was about to put the broom to him when she realized he was no ordinary raccoon, but a sad, semi-domesticated raccoon, which softened her heart. It turned out she was one of the carny attractions, “Matilda the Yak Woman,” with horns. She invited Chunky in and they became fast friends. She even asked him to become part of her show. He’d wear a little tuxedo and take tickets from the customers.
It Was All Coming Together
Things were looking up for Chunky. If Unky thought the worm heiress was more important than their friendship, then just let him get a whiff of him with the horn-headed carny gal.
Later That Night
Later that night, back at the Doo Bear Inn, Unky couldn’t stop jabbering about Gurdie. That’s when Chunky mentioned that he had met someone too and was excited for Unky and Gurdie to meet her. Well, Unky was a little surprised, and curious, and agreed to go the carnival.
Unky and Gurdie arrived at the big top along with 27 other people; it was a packed house. Then out walked Chunky in his little tuxedo, grinning ear to ear, and Matilda the Yak Woman was introduced. She walked around the ring to the amazement of several. Some clapped, others whistled, and one even fainted, but he would be okay. Then she walked over to Chunky, picked him up and gave him a big kiss on the head. Chunky just turned to butter; kissed by the Yak Woman, the star of the big top.
Unky To The Rescue
The crowd was going crazy. Maybe twenty, or even fewer, were on their feet. It was just so sweet to see Matilda and Chunky together, entertaining the crowd, and striking a blow for animal rights everywhere.
But Unky couldn’t believe it. That woman in antlers had stolen his best and closest friend. So Unky upped and jumped into the ring and demanded she put Chunky down. Chunky, still smiling, wasn’t ready to be put down. So Unky said, “Chunky, you get down right now, and get out of that ridiculous tuxedo, and go get packed cause we’re going home. And he did.
A Bitter Farewell
It was a bitter farewell. Unky and Gurdie May were teary eyed for losing their love of a lifetime. Matilda was sad over losing her hit show; it was the biggest thing to happen to the carnival in weeks.
And Chunky? Well, he was just smug and insufferable: he won his best friend back; and got rid of the flap-hatted woman in the process. And he got to have his 15 minutes of fame under the big top.
He would miss the life of a carnival star, and his little tux, and especially the Yak Woman. But it was time to go home; Unky and Chunky’s big vacation was over. And there was a Moo Cow paper bag with his name on it.
So Chunky got into the bag, Unky got them on the bus, and with memories for a lifetime; they joyfully headed home to Doofus County.
Watch for more adventures with Unky & Chunky.